Mr. Gates explaining that not a single one has ever been in a position to include his “monster hog,” billionaire philanthropist Invoice Gates reportedly provided $1 million on Wednesday to any one who designs a condom he can’t break.
“Whereas I want all who enter good luck, I ought to warn you that probably the most gifted minds have repeatedly did not develop a rubber that may face up to the thrusting of this large, throbbing one-eyed monster of mine.
My gigantic cock splits them aside each time,” stated Gates, including, “I understand how to fucking work it,” and that he’ll doubtless simply put most individuals’ contraceptives “by means of their paces with my anaconda dick.” “Peek into our bed room, and all you’ll discover is a graveyard of unhappy, tattered condoms. Trojans and Magnums it doesn’t matter—once I bust a nut, the pathetic latex bursts aside like a firehose blasting by means of a bit of goddamn paper.
Frankly, I don’t see why this katana of mine received merely lower by means of each sheath on planet Earth, the best way I shoot my load. I commend whoever dares tame this beast; nevertheless, it’s nearly sure to be a dropping battle.” At press time, a nude, totally erect Gates stood towering over what remained of greater than 10,000 torn and tattered experimental contraceptives.
SOURCED FROM: the ONION